Comments on: Making the Hard Choice

By: Puissance

Puissance — Thu, 22 May 2008 17:18:00 +0000

I really like this post. The morning test doesn’t work for me though because the first thing I think about is eating breakfast. I know I have made many easy choices because the hard choices were challenging and discouraging. I had so many doubts in my choice of major, but now I’m finding that it’s getting better.

By: michael

michael — Tue, 20 May 2008 20:32:34 +0000

The poem seems relatively clear:
We make meaningless and seemingly random decisions all the time that may or may not affect us greatly in the future.

Many (like Fred) let the last 3 lines dictate the meaning of the whole. But really, Frost puts those lines into a very different context (he will someday *tell* people — and maybe even believe himself — that he took the less traveled road, and that that road made all the difference, when in fact, it’s not necessarily so).

By: mrsmonkey

mrsmonkey — Tue, 20 May 2008 13:29:59 +0000

Trent, please credit and title the artwork you are using at the top of your articles. If they’re worthy of use, the artist is worthy of mention. This one looks like it might have been a WPA illustration ………….but who knows?

By: Kris

Kris — Tue, 20 May 2008 03:00:48 +0000

Now that’s a really good post. Makes me think of a quote I have up on my office wall from Brett Favre, former GB Packer QB, something to the effect that he remembers the tough times because that’s when he learns what he’s all about, and what is really important to him.

Thanks.

By: Fred

Fred — Tue, 20 May 2008 01:09:17 +0000

Nice post and beautiful poem. I recently faced a very difficult career decision and found this poem inspiring. Like others, I wanted to know what Frost meant by the “Road Not Taken”, so I searched the web for interpretations. I found many different scholarly opinions and eventually settled on my own. I think the traveler clearly took the “less traveled” road. The last three lines are very clear here:
“Two roads diverged in a wood, and I
I took the one less traveled by
And that has made all the difference”.
Earlier in the poem, the traveler noticed that the two roads had equal wear:
“Though as for that, the passing there
Had worn them really about the same”.
Could it be that some travelers started down the harder, less traveled road and turned back? This would have served to make the less traveled road appear more worn at the outset, near the divergence.
To me this poem is about deciding to live a virtuous life. It’s about choosing to do what’s right over what’s easy. I read a quote once that said “What is popular is not always right, what is right is not always popular.” Unknown
When the traveler retells the story some ages and ages hence, he recalls the decision with a sigh of relief. He knows in the present that he will eventually look back with gratitude at the decision. He pictures himself in the future as a happier, more thankful man, knowing that the virtuous decision was the right one, even if it was a lonelier journey.

By: Susan

Susan — Mon, 19 May 2008 22:48:02 +0000

I love the Simple Dollar. Of all the articles you’ve written, this was an answer for my most important dilemma and I am thankful for that. I am contemplating a major career switch and I’m in my late 50′s. Haven’t saved much money, but I also haven’t much debt. I’ve always been self employed–but I want to switch careers AND relocate to be closer to family. This post really gave me a blueprint to make a decision. Thank you Trent

By: Jennifer at Joy of Frugal Living

Jennifer at Joy of Frugal Living — Mon, 19 May 2008 21:49:48 +0000

Thanks for the inspiration. You are right, the hard choices are very often the most rewarding.

Jennifer

By: Michael

Michael — Mon, 19 May 2008 17:03:40 +0000

Yes, that poem betrays your article. I bet it haunts people who blithely quoted it decades ago.

By: colleen

colleen — Mon, 19 May 2008 14:08:01 +0000

Thanks for this great post. I have been reading about the benefits of diet and exercise these past few days, seeking to re-motivate myself to the healthier path from which I have lately strayed. For me the “easy” path is eating on the run and forgetting to focus on my walking plan. I want to be healthy for my children and today’s words were very timely.

By: Kate

Kate — Mon, 19 May 2008 13:06:32 +0000

A very inspiring post, Trent! Sometimes it’s hard for people to give themselves permission to make a choice that’s really in their long-term best interest.

I look forward to reading your blog every day, especially the reader comments; there are a lot of little nuggets to think about.

By: Bill K

Bill K — Mon, 19 May 2008 12:19:07 +0000

“When I was in college, I made a difficult decision to walk away from my entire social circle – people who were bending me down with negativity. Without that choice, I would have never cultivated the relationship with the wonderful woman who would become my wife.”

I went through the exact same thing, at two different times and for two different reasons. Thankfully, I made the harder choices which led me to my fiancee. :)

By: Lance

Lance — Mon, 19 May 2008 02:43:49 +0000

Great points, and right on the money! I have to agree that it’s been the hard choices I’ve made that are the most meaningful. I think it’s because they are the ones we really think through.

By: Melissa Howard

Melissa Howard — Mon, 19 May 2008 02:38:41 +0000

I’ve been reading your blog for awhile and this post and the previous post I think are exceptionally good. I also liked your post about making oatmeal – you live near where my Dad works (he actually commutes from Pella).

Thanks for the good information that you share.

By: gr8whyte

gr8whyte — Mon, 19 May 2008 00:51:42 +0000

The company I worked for was privatized in mid-2006. Shortly after, I elected early retirement. The road not taken looks a bit rough today so I’m glad I took the road less travelled then. No worries, no sighs, no regrets.

By: Andy

Andy — Sun, 18 May 2008 23:31:41 +0000

Phil: I think you’re exactly right: I might hate it, but I am excited to try it and find out. And I am happy that if I do hate it, I should have options of where to go next.

By: k E n

k E n — Sun, 18 May 2008 23:11:29 +0000

I totally understand your situation then because i’m going through it now. It is tough to make unconventional choices and what is the hardest part is people keep putting you down for it!

I’m at my university years and unfortunately my social circle happens to love expensive outings such as road trips, ski holidays, overseas travelling, etc. While i would love to go for these sort of things, my financial situation dictates i can’t really afford to spare money for any of those activities. My parents are both retired but due to unforeseen circumstances, i am left with having to foot the bill of my own university tuition fees and cost of living which i am currently trying to pay off with 2 jobs.

What i find toughest is that when i politely turn down an offer which i know i can’t afford, people will more or less put you down either directly or indirectly. Soon enough, word will go around saying how such a stingy or fun-less person i am which i am not. I wouldn’t give a second though if they invited me for lets say, a movie night or a paintball session as i have budgeted for “fun activities” but i can’t just throw $1000+ just on a single trip. Yet because of that, people will start generalising and the next thing you know, you are labelled as a tight wad and getting invites for anything would be tough. At least you found your wife and had someone to support you. Its tough when you have no one.

Btw, Robert Frost’s poem is actually called “The Road Not Taken”. It is a common mistake that many people usually make.

By: Pamela Grundy

Pamela Grundy — Sun, 18 May 2008 19:57:07 +0000

This is such a good piece. It was very helpful to me just to see someone else struggling with the same hard choices and sorting through a thought process on it. Thank you for sharing that. I cut back to half time in my ‘real’ job two months ago so I’d have more writing time, and already I have so much more paid writing work that I dread even spending 4 hours a day at my outside job. The pay is worse, the stress is worse, I hate it more every day. I know I need to let go of that job, but for now I’m hanging on. What keeps me there is the health insurance and the 115% 401K matching. It’s still getting harder and harder though. Thanks for the tips on how to think it through.

By: Vered - MomGrind

Vered - MomGrind — Sun, 18 May 2008 18:08:23 +0000

This was a highly inspiring read. Thank you. I tend to agree with a few of the other commentators, that part of the decision-making process is pure luck, because often you don’t know where your choices would lead you. But I also know that when you are true to yourself, and your passions, there is often an immediate price to pay, but that price is worth it in the long run.

By: Johanna

Johanna — Sun, 18 May 2008 17:11:12 +0000

But two lines later he says that the roads were worn “really about the same.” That sounds like a whim to me. Also, the title of the poem is “The Road Not Taken,” not “The Road Less Traveled,” so that also suggests that it’s about little choices that could go either way, not an encouragement to go off the beaten track.

I must admit I always used to read the poem like everyone else reads it. Nicholai’s interpretation is new to me, but it makes a lot of sense, and it’s a lot more applicable to my life. I’ve never really had a moment in my own life where I’ve consciously thought “I’m making the hard choice right now.” All of the really course-changing moments of my life have been choices between two roads that looked “really about the same.” I picked the roads I did, and here I am. If I’d made different choices, I’d be somewhere else entirely. Somewhere better or worse, who knows?

By: Trent

Trent — Sun, 18 May 2008 16:40:49 +0000

Nicholai: I’m not sure I agree with that, because of the third line in the second verse: “Because it was grassy and wanted wear” is why he chose the other path, not on a whim. He also knew he’d probably never have a chance to take it again: “I doubted if I should ever come back.”