It does not correlate that giving equates to some kind of big daddy complex. Giving is an act of love. What is big daddy is the way people are sometimes treated by charities and government programs.

What is kindness and love is the way a stranger came to my aid and helped me with yard work that was simply too much for me, or the marines who helped me pack when I had to move.

I choose to err on the side of compassion and giving, personally. If I occasionally get taken, okay. Truly, I’m okay with that, though I do try to be smart about it.

The problem I have with a lot of charities and government programs isn’t that they shouldn’t exist, but that they only wish to help when a need fits into a specific box. If one thing puts you out of that box, then the person doesn’t qualify for assistance. Not that they aren’t needy, simply that they don’t qualify. Their need isn’t the specific need that is met.

I can, however, see something the agencies cannot. I can see that two elderly people forced to move, and living on a fixed income need help. I can see a single mom who got laid off again needs food for her children. I can see that a relative who just started a job, won’t get paid for two weeks and the food bank says come back in three, isn’t going to make it that long.

There was a regular beggar at the off ramp on my way to work. He looked strung out, but he also appeared to be living under the nearby bridge. Yet something about him captivated me, haunted my thoughts, yet I am so clueless in the morning, I never remembered to pack him some food.

It was a Friday before a long weekend and there he stood. Despite his wild eyes, something about him reminded me of Jesus and so I prayed that I would remember him on Tuesday.

On that Tuesday morning, there was a line of cars, and about every other one was (for a change) handing him bags of food or cash. He had a stunned expression on his face, but I stopped and even having witnessed what already happened, I handed him the bag I had prepared that morning.

I watched in my rear view mirror as this continued, about every other car.

I never saw him again, though he had been a fixture for so long. I often wonder about him and the impact of that day of charity upon him. It made an impact on me. I love the whole idea of being prepared to give, not JUST with money, but with things like food that is ready to give, extra gloves or a coat in the trunk of my car.

In addition to planned giving to the local shelters, to worldwide hunger campaigns and the like, this keeps me from being so removed from need that that my compassion fails me and that I forget to be grateful for my own blessings.

And having read more of these comments, I am struck by the need for MORE compassion rather than less. It seems that people are quite ready to blame the needy for their distress, rather than to help them in the midst of it and perhaps to guide them out of it.

I like to keep food in my car that can be handed over to people in need. I work for a nonprofit that works closely with the homeless network in our area. Many of these people do get help from different charities but it doesn’t meet their needs. Giving them a few cans of food or some granola bars helps them make ends meet. I also like to carry pet food, as there are a few homeless in our area that have dogs who share in what meager food they receive.

Like another (just one, as far as I can tell!) poster mentioned, it doesn’t have to be money or nothing. I usually carry around a 5$ McDonald’s gift card for this purpose.

So the girl who needs surgery gets a check, the band that wants to go to DC to play for Obama’s inauguration gets a check (we voted for McCain!), and so forth.

We usually have about 500 bucks in the account when some need arises. The objective is to spend it all by the end of the year, & start off the next year with one dollar in the account.

We deduced that our affluence lends us to ungratefulness and an irreverence of God. Would-to-God that we were a more humble and thankful people.

Thanks Trent, I will work to apply this lesson to my life.

DebtFREEk!

By the way, I encourage us all to read Trent’s other posts about charity — he has some good thoughts to go along with this idea here.

And, Trent, I hope you could do a follow up post to all of this. I think it would be great if you could talk to some poverty and homelessness experts in your area to see what recommendations they have for dealing with these kind of situtions.

I think sometimes we need to do things whether it’s cost efficient or not. I’m numbers driven, very analytical, but I can’t ignore suffering in front of me. That’s why I like the idea of The Giving Pocket, on top of the normal contributions I would do. I think it’s human nature to be more concerned with your immediate community than the world at large, which is good and bad. It’s also a question of scale, global poverty seems so big, while helping a family get through a hard patch seems manageable.

I’m glad you both are helping raise awareness of what’s out there and still needs to be done. We all should be thinking about these things and doing what we can to make a difference.

Sometimes it’s not about what is going to be done with the money, it’s about a person. Don’t you sometimes feel like you need a beer or a slice of pizza? Wouldn’t your money be better off in a savings account? But you get the beer and slice of pizza because you want it. Well, some people want and want but can’t just get anything at any time. If they’re being honest (again, just talk to them for a minute and you’ll see) then why not get them what they want?

But that said, the handouts I give are $1-2, and I will give to simple panhandlers, not to people with elaborate stories. I figure it’s the whole neighborhood’s responsibility to chip in to support the homeless each day. My larger donations (figured into my regular budget) go to organizations that help provide long-term solutions.

I live in the Chicago area, so this is a known and chronic problem, and is often caused by underemployment, high rental costs, lack of insurance, mental illness, or other difficulties not having anything to do with substance abuse. Also, substance abuse is often a symptom, not the problem–it’s a way people cope with the realities they face. Does it become part of a cycle that makes it hard to change their reality? yes. Is it the cause of their plight? most often no.
There are some interesting (and heartbreaking) statistics here: http://www.thechicagoalliance.org/homelessstats.aspx that don’t claim to tell us what to do, but make me want to do something for individuals I see, not because they are more or less deserving than anyone else here or around the world, but because they are here in front of me. If I refuse to help the person I can see, particularly in favor of someone I can’t see (via giving money to an organization that may or may not spend it/spend it wisely), I think I’m betraying my integrity and choosing a life based in something other than compassion.

But that’s just me. Other people’s integrity and life foundations are different, and that’s okay. I just hope we can show compassion to one another as we try to make the world a better place, each in our own way.

Surveys show that people in their 20s and 30s tend to give less than older people. We tend to give impulsively and after other expenses. I encourage you to give “from the top” and with a plan.

Giving should be live saving — something you make a plan for, something you do before other expenses. I encourage you to make a goal of giving 10% of income away, with say 1% going to extreme poverty programs.

I wish folks would drop their agendas and stop telling others how they ought to give or contribute. It’s a personal decision.