Naturally, visiting the Mother church often led to seeing the Mum as well and I think it grew from there. And obviously it is easy to mix up, especially when churches fail to keep on the ball about promoting the true meaning. “Mothering Sunday” becomes interchangable with “Mother’s Day” and then suddenly a lot of people don’t know it has anything to do with church (rather than just something the church endorses) at all.

I think it’s great that a yearly opportunity to remember and honor our mothers does exist, and I do think it’s great that churches make a big deal out of it too, because if the church isn’t celebrating family in this transient world, then who will? [that was a rhetorical question.] On the other hand I agree that they should be sensitive to people in the situation Dena (no. 12) describe, so I don’t know where best to get that balance.

BUT I also wish churches made a bigger deal out of the original meaning of Mothering Sunday, and did not, in fact, combine the two. No easy answers there either.

I can use speech or writing to say “Thanks, Mom”. I can use money to buy my mom a nice gift. I don’t believe that I can use money to say “Thanks, Mom”.

tlangejr — Every year I send my mother flowers (the same kind he would occasionally buy her) on the anniversary of my father’s death — because I know she’s thinking of him. Could that be adapted to your situation?

Except this year when I’ll be overseas, we’re buying cards in advance and going to mail them from there.

I live in West Virginia, which is where both Mother’s Day and Father’s Day originated (Grafton, WVa and Fairmont, WVa respectively), and they were originally church services honoring the parents. Respect for your elders is important in Appalachian culture.

I suggest asking your parent what they want to do for Mother’s/Father’s/Grandparent’s Day. You might be surprised.

Also, I want to point out that just birthing a child doesn’t make you the sole parent. 6% of all children in this country are raised by grandparents, not to mention step-children, adopted children, foster children, etc. Keep in mind those non-traditional, yet worthy-of-acknowledgement parents when creating a Mother’s/Father’s/Grandparent’s Day tradition for your family.

My mom is a true victim of consumerism and honestly, she’d be a little disappointed if I didn’t get her a card, even though I show her I care all year round. Personally, I think cards are a waste of money, but if that $3 provides something that my mom sees as a sign of appreciation, I’ll do it.

That’s on top of the visits I make to see her every 1-2 weeks and the phone calls to check in, which I do just because she’s my mom and I love her.

I don’t need any more tchotkes! Or bears with clothes, I made the mistake of telling my husband the little stuffed bears with clothes were cute. Uff da! I got lots

I remember my mom always asked for “good kids,” which never made any sense to me because it was nearly impossible to give that. I just wanted to give her something I could make or buy! Changing my behavior (especially toward my siblings) was waaaay too hard. :)

As the mother of three kids under five, alone time is hard to come by. I would really enjoy some quiet time at home by myself or at the spa. I asked for a hot stone massage for Mother’s Day. We’ll see what I actually get.

I buy cards still, for my mother and mothers-in-law who don’t live close by. They like that sort of thing.

My mother, mother-in-law, and grandmother live a little far away for me to “just stop by” on Mother’s Day. But I’ll make sure to send them all cards, and a picture of my baby – their granddaughter/great-granddaughter.