Comments on: Rule #6: Stop Trying to Impress Other People.

By: Debt Counselling

Debt Counselling — Thu, 30 Sep 2010 09:43:42 +0000

Wow, so true.

I had the problem in the past where I had to wear name brands e.g nike, nice car etc. to impress people, but as I matured my mindset changed.

So now I am content with what I have and I don’t need to impress nobody and put myself in debt to impress them.

By: zach

zach — Fri, 10 Sep 2010 22:06:06 +0000

“You don’t need a McMansion, a shiny car, an iPhone, or a $50 haircut”
well, as you will find out by what i write below, i completely disagree with this article and many comments.
i doubt i could fit 2 enormous pool tables, a very large tennis table, 4 king sized beds, a large pool for the kids(i will not deny them they’re favourite type of exercise), all the gardens for my wife to enjoy her gardening hoppy with, the guest area, and the endless amount of other items we have, into anything else but a “mcmansion”?

since i (and many other people) have the funds available, you’re going to tell us not to buy a nice, comfortable car to cruise around in? i bought the cars for my personal enjoyment (as many other people do), and certainly not for impressing people off the street.

without my iphone, i have no idea how i would stay organized. it syncs all of my mail accounts, notes, calendar info, etc. to make sure my imac, pcs, and iphone have the same info, and constantly updates anything i change/do, via mobileme. it has hundreds of thousands of apps, including MANY extremely useful ones. now, of course i could do without it, but i would not be able to remain in my current job without it… i’m sure many other expensive cellular phones have similar, very helpful abilities

any haircut less than 100 for me has been ridiculous, and if you honestly don’t care if your hair is a nightmare, then go ahead and get a cheap haircut; you certainly won’t be impressing other people then.

apologies if some of my writing makes no sense, im in a pretty big rush right now. after reading this and a couple comments, i had to comment on this ridiculous article, and how some people actually DO need these things, for other reasons than to impress others…

By: Mark

Mark — Mon, 30 Aug 2010 20:59:02 +0000

Most people spend their entire life trying to impress others. That is why most of us aspire to get a better job, education and material possessions. Honestly, we only do it to impress others and to avoid the “mediocre” lable that most of us dread. Why we continue to deny this is beyond me. Human nature is so easy to predict.

By: Dorothy

Dorothy — Wed, 19 May 2010 19:48:25 +0000

I find that there is nothing wrong with material things if you want them for YOU, not to impress and you can pay for them with ease, not having to rob Peter to pay Paul. If you tithe, save, spend, and invest your money wisely,then you can treat yourself to wonderful things. The problems come when folks buy to impress others of their ‘status’ and don’t have a pot to you know what in and not even the window to throw it out of! Lots of people do not like high end and are happy with what they have $ that’s cool. I find it a bit disturbing is when people who do like high end are heavily criticized for having it. That I call simple jealousy and not called for. Live and let live.

By: Derek

Derek — Fri, 30 Apr 2010 02:07:40 +0000

heh its interesting how you guys are talking about people are more valued based on their personality such as confidence which makes them succesful. I think those sucessful people also buy expensive clothing and cars and etc. I think the main focus is, don’t spend unecssary money on things that you cant afford and will only hamper you down financially. Coming from a rich family, I guess my opinions are somewhat biased.

By: Derek

Derek — Fri, 30 Apr 2010 02:01:44 +0000

hmm i dont know about this issue. I feel like getting flashy cars, cool clothes, and the latest gadgets, BECAUSE I WANT TO. Sure it makes me look like a poser, someone whose sole purpose is to impress, but it’snot that simple. I’m sure there are other people out there who get the “cool stuff” not just to impress, but because they want to, simply because it’s a total must buy.

By: Jim Bauer

Jim Bauer — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 14:40:36 +0000

Warren Buffet is perhaps the quintessential example of the unimportance of impressing others. Being the 2nd richest man on the planet affords him all the luxuries and toys he could ever dream up, yet he lives in the same house he’s lived in for years, drives an older model car, and wears dated clothes. People who spend to impress typically have something within themselves that is lacking, and it’s the ‘impression’ of success and importance that they need to fulfil that void. Being yourself is not only cheaper, but as you stated (and very importantly) your life will be filled with a much better calibur of people as well, thereby enriching your life more than money or toys could ever afford.

By: Ellen

Ellen — Wed, 09 Sep 2009 15:08:11 +0000

Though I see your point, sometimes these extras aren’t really about impressing people. For example, workplaces have different regulations for how professional you should look on the job. Though this may be about impressing people, you shouldn’t skimp on your budget in this instance. Also, owning a house can be very self-rewarding and provide a family with much-needed space. Though, I have to agree that the McMansion is probably a little too extravagant to be all for the sake of one’s needs. I guess, my point is that each person can not just group clothes, cars, and electronics into the category of “To Impress Others,” you really need to assess that for yourself.

By: Diana

Diana — Wed, 12 Aug 2009 20:56:05 +0000

“Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people.”

Just a thought, but I find that people are incredibly fascinating to discuss. Although I may be taking a different angle and discussing things like human nature, physiology and thought processes I find that I am no less great than those who don’t discuss this.

By: donny

donny — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 05:39:20 +0000

or your in a life situation where cant just change all your life details the way you want because people are dependant on you

By: Sybil

Sybil — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 01:12:32 +0000

As the motto says “Don’t try to keep up with the Jones’”. Many people judge on material things instead of the individual. I think if you have to dress or drive something for others to like you they are not liking you for you, but for what you have. Doing all this is going to take you straight to the poor house.

By: business

business — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 22:11:55 +0000

This is great advice for everyone. And it’s true, all the extras in life are really merely for impressing people. It doesn’t help you intrinsically at all. I hadn’t thought of it this way. Thank you for being so clear.

By: Steve @ Freedom Education

Steve @ Freedom Education — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 17:38:54 +0000

Hi Trent,

Out of all the content on your site, I really enjoy these list posts on your personal growth experiences. This quote was good,

“It was easy to stop caring about impressing people whose opinions I didn’t care about. Who cares what they think?”

… which reminds me of something I’ve read recently that said,

“What other people think of me is none of my business,”

Good rule of thumb ;)

By: chessiq

chessiq — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 16:00:09 +0000

#17 Jenzer – referred to this book. You can read it for free at google books: http://books.google.com/books?id=_MkhotfYjn8C&lpg=PP1&ots=CWkVzPiywo&dq=The%20Top%2010%20Distinctions%20Between%20Millionaires%20and%20the%20Middle%20Class-%20by%20Keith%20Cameron%20Smith&pg=PP1

By: RB @ Richby30Retireby40

RB @ Richby30Retireby40 — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 13:54:10 +0000

I have a neighbor who bought a $100,000 second hand Aston Martin DB9 last month. Although he spent $100,000, he did save $95,000 buying it 2 years old given it costs $195K new!

He does have low self esteem, so if the car makes him feel better about himself, then that’s fine.

I’ve been guilty of car splurges in the past too, but only 1 out of the 8 cars i’ve had in 10 years was really expensive ($73K). The others averaged around $10K.

Best,

By: Kate@LivingTheFrugalLife

Kate@LivingTheFrugalLife — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 11:27:23 +0000

Great rule, and very powerful and freeing when it can be applied consistently in life.

There is however another category of people who spend money on the things you mentioned at the beginning of your post: people with compulsive behavioral problems. Some people spend just to spend because maybe, once upon a time, it made them feel good. Like most addictions, the pleasure fades with time and only the compulsion remains. But I suspect there are a fair number of people with compulsions around spending and acquisition. Not sure how much this rule would help them, at least not without professional counseling.

By: Sharon

Sharon — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 19:27:29 +0000

Marianne, I wish you healing and good health.

By: Charlotte

Charlotte — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 13:58:21 +0000

Mighty, please, NO perfume. What smells good to one person smells bad to another. Besides, many people are allergic. Be kind to others and wear no scents.

By: Kevin@OutOfYourRut

Kevin@OutOfYourRut — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 13:29:26 +0000

I don’t even think we necessarily need to impress people on the job either, not with clothes or cars.

Cars and clothes are often part of the profile of the pretenders. The real competitors are recognized by their production, confidence and competance. Those are the qualities that bring the money in the door or get the jobs done that are necessary to bring the money in.

If cars and clothes rule the day where you work, you might need to find someplace else to work.

By: littlepitcher

littlepitcher — Sat, 25 Jul 2009 11:51:57 +0000

he sad truth is that the job is the only place in our lives where impressing others is key.
If working with others, the wardrobe and car are a way of saying “Don’t mess with me, I can afford an attorney on retainer”, or to keep the office bi***es at bay by implying that said creatures would merely be taking out their jealousy on you.

Outside of that malignant necessity, impressing anyone except potential mates is wasted money.