At the beginning of January, I made a list entitled Best/Worst of 2009. I had several entries right away for both sides of the list, and each day more things would come to me and I’d add them to the list. It put alot of things in perspective to make that list. It was also re-assuring that the *Best* list was way longer than the *Worst* list. Also, it’s interesting to see which things were in my control and which things were totally not in my control. I saved the printed list with my 2009 tax returns and I plan to do this every year from here on out.

It’s funny you have been talking about this, Trent because it’s actually been a huge issue in our own house right now because we have made a goal to move in the next year. We tried to last year and found that many decisions we made during the year prevented it. Now we’re trying to make decisions that help us move instead of preventing it. We’re doing it with both big things (like not buying a new TV even though we’d both like one) and the little things, like my husband switching his morning Monster for flavored water.

Thanks for the post Trent, it’s posts like this that help keep me on track for the important things.

I always shop alone, and have luckily outgrown those cues. I used think of those voices as “the invisible judge”. Once I silenced that invisible, mythical judge, I was much more relaxed about my house as well.

When I borrow a library book, one of 3 things generally happens:
1. I end up keeping the library book, paying huge fines and a premium price for the book
2. I give it back eventually (usually after several renewals and fines) and then wish for years that I’d kept it
3. I end up buying it somewhere else.

For instance, I read a library book in Calgary 30 years ago about cooking on a budget and I wish to this day that I had that book. I don’t remember the title or the author but it had great planning tips and recipes I tried and liked but no longer have. I have no way to even track down the book to find it again.

I’ve finally started looking on ebay and in used bookstores for books I loved and lost along the way (ones I have hard info on, so that they’re findable) and am slowly buying.

Life choices are made much differently in those instances, because both the financial and emotional issues are different. And the challenges are different too.

And fyi, it’s not all about spending on one’s self.

We’ve known singles who put nieces and nephews through school and all but paid for every expense (since the aunt/uncles had little income). They were often the “sponsors” of special lessons, trips and gifts. In general, every single we know is a huge gift giver to any of the kids and often to many of the adults as well. (And often expected to be and when they are not, look out. Family criticism is high.)

And it is the single person who is normally expected to give the most in time and money to a parent…and from our experience, usually does.

Constantly reading how one makes one’s “family” (spouse & Kids) the focal point in choosing how to spend is valid, but it does not apply to a lot of the population.

Ah, but wait. I forgot that the folks who don’t have kids are not really here doing anything important–they don’t really contribute to society because they did not reproduce. So I guess those folks are not worth addressing.

One last observation: When people put their own families first in everything, they often neglect or bypass other life responsibilities, including other family and civic contributions.

The core family should be strong and stable, so that its members can then reach out and beyond their own comfort and concerns.

Sometimes, reading this blog, it feels like it’s all about this one little unit and nothing more. Just keeping it safe in its own walls.

Life is not just spouses/companions and kids.

And there really is not a lot about single parents (male or female) who have kids and no spouses on this blog that I’ve seen.

Need some diversity and other thoughts on frugality, etc. from their perspective. Just a thought.

Doesn’t take away from the quality of what you’ve written, but maybe it’s time to expand beyond your comfort zone of knowledge and learn more and write more about other citizens. That said, I totally support your right to focus solely on what you choose when you write. It is YOUR blog!

(And yes, books are not gazingus pins when a room without books is like a body without a soul.)

While I can appreciate looking at one topic from several different angles, some fresh details and examples would improve the posts…

As you say here–it is knowing what is truly important to you. Makes it very personal.

Thank you.

I think this is the greatest thing you’ve ever said on The Simple Dollar.

I’m only 23, but looking around that framework seems to be what most people are missing. That includes my peers, those a few years ahead of me, and those way ahead.

It’s almost like people are too busy living the way they think they should, never taking the time to realize those central values and make adjustments as appropriate.