Comments on: The People Around You

By: Bobby

Bobby — Fri, 07 May 2010 17:59:55 +0000

yeah, wish i had that. Moved out east last year, company is full of greybeards resentful that their 401k are gone, can’t date due to time at work and lack of options (rural area, chaotic management), no friends to speak of.
Trying my best to get back west, but the job market is appalling (1200+ applicants in 4 months, 10 interviews on the phone, no returns). Whiskey helps though!

By: Barbara@BabyBloggingBoomer

Barbara@BabyBloggingBoomer — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 01:51:36 +0000

I love this post. I particularly like the part about surrounding yourself with supportive people. I’ve linked this post to my blog to share with my friends. I feel like a winner just thinking about the support I get and I intend to be the one to give more in the future.

By: SLCCOM

SLCCOM — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 20:22:25 +0000

You also can’t assume that someone pointing out all the ways you can fail is necessarily “not supportive.” They may be playing Devil’s advocate, or just giving you a reality check. If the conversation includes areas that you need to work on before taking the leap, it is very positive. Or you may realize that you need a partner with strengths in your area of weakness.

I think we all know people who we advised against a particular path because we could clearly see pitfalls they couldn’t, and sadly watched as they succumbed to the pitfalls that they blithely disregarded.

By: deRuiter

deRuiter — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 09:32:56 +0000

You can learn a lot from some negative people. Thinking of starting a new business? Go talk to your friendly local banker and you’ll come away with loads of ideas of how failure can be easily achieved in your project. This is not to discourage you, it’s so that you can learn, from a person who has seen (bank loan officer) an incredible amount of human and business failure. Consider the source of negative comments. Use useful negative thoughts them as guides. Don’t let them depress you. On the other hand, there are people who only see the grim side and potential for failure, it’s their nature. This type of person is toxic and ought to be avoided and their conversation ignored, because they only want to drag you down into depression and failure. On the other hand, a constant cheer leader who always says, “Oh yes, do it, great idea!” to every single thought, idea, project, isn’t much help in the real world. It’s your responsibility to know your own mind and to seek advice (positvie and negative ideas) from those who are qualified to give guidance.
Ditto to Brad’s and Brittany’s idea, lose the pointless clip art photos. They’re distracting.

By: Brittany

Brittany — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 02:53:39 +0000

Second Brad. Random pics are super annoying.

By: brad

brad — Wed, 14 Apr 2010 00:26:53 +0000

thumbs down on the pics. if people mean enough to you to write a post about, upload a pic of them, not random clip arts.

By: Money Reasons

Money Reasons — Tue, 13 Apr 2010 16:31:53 +0000

I’ve had an mixed upbringing with respect to people that support me.

When I was younger, non-support affected me to a high degree. But (and I suppose this is true with many like me) each year I aged, I became more confidence in myself and trusted my opinion.

I try to do that same with my kids (especially my son), but every now and then, the way I was raised kicks in and I get impatient. I often have to apologies for coming across to hard on him…

I hope I become more of a good dad and mentor for my children, but I’m still learning right along with them…

By: Amanda B.

Amanda B. — Tue, 13 Apr 2010 16:29:35 +0000

The only thing I would change about this is the people you would consider yourself “responsible for”. I don’t think having an unsupportive spouse is insurmountable. It can definitely be a problem, but not one that warrant divorce (which would be required to remove them from your life). In fact, a spouse can often be called “unsupportive” when in fact they are being grounded. For example, if Trent’s wife wasn’t working when he decided to pursue writing full time, she my have been more concerned with keep a roof over their heads than encouragement. I am sure, however, that Trent was not suggesting the immediate divorce from any spouse that doesn’t support one’s most trivial goals.

By: Brent

Brent — Tue, 13 Apr 2010 15:26:15 +0000

This point was highlighted for me in my teens. I was at a point where i was so frustrated and mad that I couldn’t think straight. A mentor pulled me aside and complimented me admiring some of my traits, encouraged me to rise above the problem, and offered his assistance if it got to be something I couldn’t rise above. By the time we finished talking my mood had returned to a positive state. I am very grateful for that man and that conversation. I want to be that man and to encourage the people around me to be their best.

By: Crystal

Crystal — Tue, 13 Apr 2010 14:40:45 +0000

Great points! I’m happy with my life mainly due to the positive people in it. I hope I’m seen as a positive addition to their lives as well.

By: Frugillionaire

Frugillionaire — Tue, 13 Apr 2010 14:26:23 +0000

What a fabulous article!

Like you, I’m fortunate enough to be surrounded by incredibly supportive people as I make the transition from full-time worker to full-time writer. And I agree, sometimes a few encouraging words are all you need to keep you on track towards your goals. :-)