“You are not really taking on your parents’ “burden of parenthood”.”

I think Trent was talking about the general burden of parenthood.

Cant tell you how many times I’ve head this, but to actually implement them in your life can save so much grief. Great rules to live by!

I haven’t read all your archives, admittedly, but to me this had the most definite “voice” and the most potent sense of belief of all that I have read from you.

What I find helpful is to take a step back and write down on paper the pros and cons of what it is you think you “need,” and to really hold yourself to strict interpretations of “pros.” (I.E. “Because it’s cool” or “because everyone has one” isn’t valid to be a “pro” in my book.)

I still struggle with this myself though so I have a long way to go.

And Trent, “journies?” Have you no spellchecker? Yikes.

The negative tone here surprises me since you have always come across as a proud and involved dad. Being a parent can be exhausting physically, emotionally and even financially, but it is also a joy. Perhaps you just need some more quality sleep. Parenthood brings many responsibilities, hopefully not burdens.

You are not really taking on your parents’ “burden of parenthood”. They already raised their family. That ‘burden’ no longer exists. You are raising your OWN family, by your own choice. You have written before about how you and your wife planned for and, I thought, waited for the arrival of your third child with excited anticipation. I’m sure you never want your children to feel that they were a burden to you.

My children are now almost adults themselves. As my late mother would say “when they are young they are a handfull, when they are older they are a heartfull”. I have to say though that I have never felt parenthood was a burden. I hope I pass on to my children my belief that being a parent was not a burden, but the very best thing that ever happened to me. My children are my greatest blessings.

The picture you paint of adulthood seems rather bleak, as though we will without question find ourselves in bad situations using phrases like: “the responsibilities of being an adult often curl around your feet like vines, holding you in a place you might very well not want to be.”

Yes, people should prepare for the bad times in life, they should have a plan but I don’t feel that fear of the bad is the best motivator for preparation.

I don’t know, I think this is a good article with a good message, a fair and honest one, no doubt, but still somehow rubs me the wrong way. Maybe its that I’m still in the “Western youth” stage in life where I tend to search for good rather than the bad in life. I have a tendency to shuck off bad thoughts and only focus on best case scenarios.

Either way, interesting article, Trent. Maybe I’ll re-read it to see if I might have taken the tone wrong or am reading into something I ought not to.