1. Target and Best Buy stores (not online) sell new Kindles. I’m not sure if they are latest generation but I do know that not on sale the Kindle runs for about $140 at either store.

2. Don’t overlook the sales right now in favor of the Black Friday sales. There has been a lot in the media about this, but I just want to remind everyone. For example, my daughter has a Leapster (an educational hand held gaming system). Games usually run for about $25 each. Target has games on sale right now for $13 each but only until the day before Thanksgiving. There is a $5 coupon out there (don’t have the link on hand but you can search for Leapster coupon) so I’m able to buy multiple games for my daughter at $8 each. I’m hitting the store tomorrow to buy at least 2 different games for her, maybe 3.

And Steve, I do remember the gifts I got last year, each and every one of them and they all still mean something to me and get used regularly.

That said, I don’t see what’s wrong with using sales for gift ideas. I buy gifts only for my parents and siblings, so I have a limited gift list. If I were to see a sale on something one of them would like (especially if it’s something that would be out of my price range at regular price), I would buy it and use it as my gift to that person.

Maybe someone should give me typing lessons for Christmas–

You captured my feelings baout gift cards exactly!

I used to do all my shopping on Black Friday and Christmas Eve, because I loved the Christmassy rush of the crowds. No longer. Ever since they trampled that man to death I’ve seen the horror in our annual one-day buying frenzy. After what happened to Damou, I can’t believe the stores are still allowed to hold sales like that.

It’s Buy Nothing Day for me, too, from now on.

By doing it the traditional way, I fear that many people end up with a bunch of stuff that they probably got great deals on, but probably don’t need as well.

Therefore, was it a bargain after all, or not?

…when I suggest that I prefer not to participate in the holiday shopping frenzy, some people have instead interpreted it as “I hate Christmas, I hate the baby Jesus, I hate your gifts, and I hate you.”

You made me laugh out loud!

It’s a tricky thing to navigate, because people often unconciously attach and ascribe a lot of emotions and motives to gift-giving. One example is the first Christmas gift exchange between a new couple. Anyone who’s been through that knows the potential for hurt feelings due to mismatched expectations.

I know that when I express a preference for charitable donations instead of gifts, or even when I suggest that I prefer not to participate in the holiday shopping frenzy, some people have instead interpreted it as “I hate Christmas, I hate the baby Jesus, I hate your gifts, and I hate you.”

I often feel like I’m held hostage by consumerism and tradition. It’s a real minefield to suggest any changes in gift-giving, with huge potential for hurt feelings. If the other person doesn’t want to make a change, then I’m the Christmas killjoy. “Smug” and “self-righteous” are subjective, not objective, labels, and it’s impossible to defend myself – how can I possible prove that I’m NOT self-righteous? I can’t, so I continue to participate in gift exchanges I don’t enjoy just so I don’t “ruin it for everyone else”.

My in-laws are a perfect example – I would like to just buy for the kids, but my sister-in-law won’t go for it. So the adults do a gift exchange of $100 gift cards. It has to be gift cards because several of the recipients are the type to complain if a gift is not exactly what they wanted. I’ve suggested privately to my husband that we could all just sit in a circle and pass a $100 bill to the person on our right, but instead I get a gift card to a store I probably wouldn’t choose to spend $100 at on my own.

I suggested (gently and nicely)that we scale down or change the gift exchange, and it was not well-received. All of this is a long-winded explanation of why I’m sensitive to comments like “smug”. For some people, even the *suggestion* that the shopping and gifts could be scaled back or eliminated is met with a “so you think you’re better than me?” attitude.

I honestly don’t want “stuff”. The things I would like and don’t have are more expensive than I could reasonable expect anyone but my husband to purchase. I love receiving homemade gifts, but not everyone has the time or inclination to make things. I am never anything but gracious when receiving a gift, but when asked what I would like I can truly say I would prefer a donation to a charity over anything from a store. I’ve been told, by several people, that this is the wrong answer and that I’m taking the fun out of Christmas. I would love it if someone bought a cow for a family in Africa instead of getting me a present!

I see no point at all joining the herd at the Black Friday zoo.

Aerin–I did not mean to imply that all charitable endeavors–even shared ones, are bad. I was simply referring, again, to a small set of self-righteous folks who take pleasure in imagining themselves morally superior to others. The type who would suggest charitable giving as an alternative to Xmas presents, and who then would make it clear, through raised eyebrows or pursed lips, that you had damned well better comply or be thought of as selfish and damned. apologies if I was unclear.

SLCCOm–you are right! Everyone should relax and enjoy these times. We only get so many, and they go so fast–

I have limited resources, and a basic amount of what I can afford to spend for each gift recipient. I carry that list in my wallet. When I see something a specific someone might love- I get it!

Sometimes it is a bit over, sometimes it is a bit under. Overall, I come in under budget, because often I get an idea of something I want to make for someone, and that requires a lot of generosity with time, but very little money.

Having a full year (I start on the new year) allows for thoughtful meaningful gifts for all my recipients- no rushing or burn-out. I enjoy taking my time, and even so, I usually finish shopping in September, just because I have run out of people on my list!

In extremely lean years, having a very small gift budget has ended up with some of the most creative and memorable gifts I have ever given. It is a fun challenge, and it always reminds me of the snowed in Christmas on Little House on the Prairie!

There is indeed, a way to marry tight budgeting, thoughtfulness, generosity, and serendipity. And the best part is, that there is no holiday stress at all. Just relaxing and family, from Halloween till New Year.

Oh, and by keeping track of what has been bought in an excel doc, I avoid repeat or too-similar gifts from year to year. Not that it matters, but I like to challenge myself to surprise people from year to year.

My one exception is the 100 for my childrens’ big gifts. I have learned from experience that teens can change their minds in a month’s span. I’ll get their one special thing (aside from socks and such) for them in late Nov or Dec., but never on Black Friday- not our kind of merch anyway.

I’ve had people suggest a change in traditions, and I did not label them as smug or killjoys. I have had friends and family suggest that we stop exchanging gifts, or that we draw a name from a hat instead of buying for every person. I’ve suggested to others that we make donations instead of buying gifts. Some people welcomed the changes, some preferred to leave things as they are. No one was ignoring the spirit of the season or wallowing in self-righteousness.

Gee I”m so glad we’ve never had those evil cows here in America. Just think how awful our country would be if we’d let cows ruin it!!

However, there is something smug and killjoy about those people who plan their Christmas shopping months in advance and budget it down to the penny–especially if there is no overwhelming economic need for them to do so. They leave themselves no room for serendipity–stumbling across the absolute perfect item for a friend or family member.

There is also something irredeemably smug about those who would restrict the holiday giving of other people to charitable donations. Forced charity is not true charity–it is a chore, something to be accomplished quickly and forgotten about. No one should give money to anything so that someone ELSE can feel better about himself / herself and pretend that he/she is a good person.

The solution? Enjoy yourself. Let the wonder of the the Christmas message inspire you. Don’t let either the hucksters or the self-righteous make you crazy.