To me, at least, the idea of not meeting my grandchildren ever is a lot more motivation than the idea of looking fat in the next family photo or even of being called fatty (which has happened to me recently.)

However, as we look around, we see many people who do, in their way, love their families but are still making choices (or doing nothing) that create real challenges in their life, or who fail to deal with the life they are given in healthy ways.

Loving is important (who wants to be human and NOT love others?) but when it comes to creating change in one’s life, it is often the love we receive from others that helps us to do what we must to turn our lives around.

It isn’t just Who do you love? But also, who loves you.

And of course, in some cases (can we say Charlie Sheen), even having people who love you and support you is not enough.

It also comes down to whether you love yourself (in a healthy not egotistical way) and feel you are “worthy” of a good life.

So much of life is self-sabotage, which is often derived from feelings of unworthiness (Look hard at overspenders and those with discipline on spending and you’ll see that the former often have very low self-esteem while the latter have it in sufficient quantities to create a life they want, no matter what).

So. First, love yourself, and extend that love to others. Then, open yourself to receive love and support.

A lot easier said than done because for all the talk about love in the world, people can be extremely stingy if not outright hoarders with it.

I think often of the many teachers I had over the years who loved their work, loved their students and the difference they made–especially for the many kids who came from many tough environments. (I have a friend now who runs programs for high school kids from very tough backgrounds. You cannot imagine in how many ways these kids bask in his love, attention and interest. Love is just a word until you back it up with attention, interest and interaction.)

I agree with Trent that we should keep our loved ones in mind. We should also look out in the world and realize that everyone we encounter can benefit from our attention and respect. Individuals can and do make a huge difference in life.

We lost our dear dog at 15 years and — as the recent earthquake in Christchurch reminds me — I never know when I will lose someone I love. None of us ever looks back and says, “Gee, I wish I’d spent more time shopping.”