Yes, if she’s giving him more than $13,000 per year and has already made gifts of more than $5 million over the course of her life. Those are some pretty large gifts.

Used car lots. Autotrader. Craigslist. Local newspaper classified ads.

You’ll have to settle for an older car and/or one with high mileage.

“It’s your money, do what you want” is all well and good, and in principle I don’t disagree, but the decisions you make with your money have consequences, and you have to own those consequences – even if (or especially if) they don’t play out until after you’re gone and it’s too late for you to do anything about them. It sounds like Mary wants to divide her estate in a way that she knows is going to be hurtful (she’s aware that the two daughters she mentions, at least, are under the impression that they’re going to receive an inheritance), and she wants to be absolved of any responsibility for the hurt she might cause. She says she doesn’t want to “punish” her children, but writing a child out of your will in retaliation for a poor relationship with you *is* a punishment. She can either punish her children, or not, but she needs to take responsibility for it either way.

And again, if what Mary really wants is to have better relationships with her older children, the solution is for her to start rebuilding those bridges now, not to stew on it until it’s too late.

And if what she wants is to reward her youngest son for the sacrifices he’s made for her (and it does sound like he’s really gone above and beyond), I agree with Karen (#17) that she should look for ways to help him *now*, if she’s able.

My MIL tried to cultivate a relationship with her daughter and grandchildren and they chose not to reciprocate. After awhile, it gets tiring to ALWAYS be the one to initiate contact and so you give up trying. And she’s hurt that they’ve disowned her now that they all know they won’t be getting a cent from her after her death. Her money isn’t OWED to them just because they are her child/grandchildren.

My own late grandmother rarely called me in her last few years of life. I did try to call her once a week and she ALWAYS made sure she called me on my birthday and would even sing Happy Birthday to me over the phone. We always received gifts from her on birthdays and at Christmas. I sent her cards in the mail just because and of course for holidays. She saved them ALL! Even the ones I’d made in second grade :)

I did this because I LOVED my grandmother, not because I was sucking up expecting a large inheritance. In fact, she left nothing to her grandchildren in her will instead divying it up amongnst her three children to do as they please.

I don’t expect to inherit anything from my own parents ages 61 and 70. And honestly, my husband will not be inheriting much when his mother does pass away.

I agree with #29 Robyn except the last part of her statement that they are all her(Q1′s) children. Children and grandchildren just do not treat their parent/grandparent in the way my MIL has been treated. In my MIL’s case the attorney has been consulted and the Will is Iron Clad to assure that per MIL’s wishes her only daughter will receive nothing from the estate.

#16–because you agreed to pay a price several years ago, rather than wait for house prices to come down. It’s not “wrong” but “Oh, why, oh, why, can’t *I* get that cheap interest rate?” (designed to encourage people to buy houses now rather than get their current ones cheaper) does, in fact, sound like whining.

If you wish that they were more involved in your life, tell them so – don’t bite your tongue about it and then punish them for it when it’s too late for them to do anything.

Don’t tell them flat out that you plan to divide your estate according to who has given you the most time and attention – not unless you want them sucking up to you for the rest of your life solely so that they can get their hands on your money. Just tell them, perhaps, how much you value your relationship with your youngest child, and you wish you could have similarly full relationships with all of them.

Besides, if the situation is such that there is already a “house divided”, how is leaving them money or possessions going to fix or help that in any way? All it’s going to do is make the divided house go to war no matter what choices the parent makes with their money because despite what anyone thinks you don’t “equally” divide anything but the cash and there will always be arguements over the “prized” possesions and the actual value of everything else. The request was for how to divide her assets, not how to repair relationships with estranged kids and fix her divided house.

You will also need to prove that you can support your parents, so you need to check the CIC website to ensure that you are earning enough to meet their requirements.

You will also probably have to put at least 30% down payment on a house if you buy as a temporary resident so again, figuring out your path to permanent residency is essential.

There is also the cost of the permanent residency application depending on the process you use you may need to take an English test, you will need a medical and there is the application itself, I’d allow $1500 for that, plus another couple of hundred if you need to renew your temporary residency permit while your PR application is processed.

For your emergency fund I’d recommend starting a TFSA, and aim to fill it ($5000/year), it can also grow to accommodate your down payment savings.

You should also set up an RRSP which you can also borrow from for your down payment as a first time buyer so put as much in it as you can as well.

Thanks for the information on find a grave, that sounds like fun!