Stop Trying to Impress Other People

branches in the lake by uberculture on Flickr!Imagine, just for a moment, that you find yourself on a desert island with just you and four or five of your closest friends and relatives – the people you care about the most in this world. The only people around are the people that care about you.

On this island, you can have whatever house you want and the items you want to have. But you’re just on this island with just the people that care about you. No one else will see you. Judge you. Draw conclusions about you.

What house would you actually own? Would it be a large, ostentatious house, one designed to impress the neighbors and the people you might invite over? Or would it be a small one that just meets the needs that you have, nothing more, nothing less?

What stuff would you have? What things would you actually want with you? Would you have all of the stuff you have now, the decorations and other items you have mostly to impress others?

Spend some time thinking about this. What would you really want to have if no one was there to judge you? Would your closets be jammed with clothes? Would you have a shiny new car or the latest electronic gadgets?

Here’s the real truth of the matter: the difference between the items you’d have on the island and the things you actually have now is the stuff you’re buying solely to impress other people.

If you own a shiny new car now, but would drive a junker if just your family were watching, you’re spending money just to impress other people.

If you have a closet full of expensive clothes, but would always wear jeans and a t-shirt around the people close to you, you’re spending money just to impress other people.

If you have a bunch of nifty electronic gadgets that you love to show off but never use, you’re spending money just to impress other people.

If you live in a big beautiful house in a big beautiful neighborhood, but around your core people you’d be happy in a tiny house that didn’t demand upkeep, you’re spending money just to impress other people.

Here’s the truth, though. For the most part, those other people don’t matter. Not a bit. Sure, you need to dress to match the culture of the place where you work and so on, but many of the things we buy we do so to impress others.

The next time you’re tempted to make a major purchase – say, anything over $20 or so – ask yourself who you’re buying it for. Are you looking at that giant flat panel for you – or to impress the boys? Are you tempted to get that gorgeous car because it’ll turn heads – or just to get you back and forth to work? Are you eyeing that huge house just to see the reactions on people’s faces – or because you actually need 3,500 square feet?

Then remember this one thing: the people who really care about you don’t care how big your television is or how shiny your car is. They care about you – are you happy and secure in your life? And the surest way to add a lot of stress to your life is to buy something you really can’t afford and be stuck with payments on it for a long time.

Make a real effort to separate what matters to you from what you think matters to everyone else because, in the end, it’s you that you’re left with at the end of the day. It’s you that will be worried at night if the bills pile up.

Fleeting three-second opinions of others don’t matter. What matters are the real relationships we build – and those aren’t bought and sold with a big screen television.

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  1. A. Dawn says:

    We waste lots of our time thinking what others think. Others are too busy thinking the same and they don’t have time to think about ourselves. What others think – this type of fear usually come from our own securities. Stop comparing, judging, keeping up yourself with others and live a happy life.
    Cheers,
    A Dawn
    http://www.adawnjournal.com

  2. Derek says:

    In Warren Buffett’s new biography, “The Snowball: Warren Buffett and the Business of Life,” Alice Schroeder mentions one of the most important lessons Warren Buffett has ever learned:

    The difference between pleasing your inner scorecard (What makes you happy) and your outer scorecard (What people think of you).

    I agree with both Warren Buffett and Trent. You need to do what makes you happy as that is the only thing that matters. And eventually… you’ll probably end up saving some money a long the way.

  3. !wanda says:

    Well, it is important to have professional-quality clothes on hand (by which I mean suits, not $150 jeans) because people do judge you on how appropriately your clothes match your milieu. (I’ve been driven to distraction because I went to a seminar where a man who wanted to get a postdoc job in a lab was wearing what appeared to be a women’s suit jacket, and I spent all the boring bits looking at the jacket and trying to figure out how a man would make that mistake. (His other attire was all male, btw, so he wasn’t transgender or anything.)) I’m sure it would be the same with cars, TVs, and such, but most people whose job it is to evaluate you don’t see your other possessions.

  4. E. Paul says:

    This post resonated with me, probably because I live in Los Angeles, which is a bastion of artifice. Every thing you say is right on the mark, but just remember that personal passion can dovetail with other peoples idea of trying to impress. Someone with a passion for cars would likely invest their resources into a car that would no doubt impress others. The important thing to focus on is motive and opportunity.
    My husband is a screen writer, and when I showed him this article he scoffed at the big TV example. His passion in life is film. He sees an absurd amount of movies, and wants the optimal setup to enjoy them. He said forget the big TV, I would build a movie theatre on my desert island.
    It’s important to remember that each individual’s motive for ownership is their own, and while it’s socially responsible to only acquire within your means and to put necessities first, we can’t impute the reasons for ownership as outside observers.

  5. Derek says:

    It’s funny that you mention this… Everytime I try to justify making that next big purchase, I always go back to the times I’ve visited Mexico, Costa Rica or Jamaica. When you are in a naturally beaufitul place like that, possessions mean nothing. It’s just the sunset or the sunrise on a beach that you want to share with your friends or loved ones.

    Unfortunately in a place like Las Vegas, you’ll never have that sort of freedom. It’s always a rat race, always keeping up with the Jones’, and trying to enjoy yourself without a nice presentation is next to impossible.

    In a land of the shallow, it really transforms you until it’s hard to look at yourself in a mirror.

  6. Thanks for another great article! As Wanda pointed out, dressing appropriately in the workplace is important, but it’s amazing how much we really do worry about what others think of us. If strangers even take the time to form an opinion of us (which they often don’t), their three seconds of approval or disapproval certainly isn’t worth ridiculous purchases or constant concern over our self-image. Those who really care about us will love us even without a mansion.

  7. jreed says:

    Would you put up a clothesline?

  8. Ronnie says:

    I agree with Wanda, but professional quality doesn’t have to mean silly expensive either. My boss and I are attorneys with a $1 million practice. We both drive Honda Civics. She also has a used Miata, for which she wrote a check. We just went through a HUGE trial (family law) where the wife had on a gorgeous suit, and the husband confided that it cost her $4,000. My suit was $80; so was my boss’. The next day she was talking about her daughter’s $500 Juicy Couture jumpsuit. She can definitely afford both items, she makes an outstanding salary (as does her husband). One of the major contentions was her spending though; regardless of how much she made, there was very little to show for it. I can attest to the truth of that, and that most of the savings was because the husband forced it. Of course, I think they’re both complicit in the spending habits of the family, but it’s very important to me that the people that we represent who make the MOST tend to have similar spending habits as myself and my boss. It gives me some further assurance that I’m on the right track.

  9. Amateur says:

    Probably the most baffling thing to me is when parents spend crazy amounts of money on designer infant and toddler clothing to outfit their kids. It doesn’t make the kid more popular on the playground nor does it block hardcore grass stains. There’s no real benefit and the kids certainly won’t get smarter wearing them.

  10. Amber says:

    This is an interesting exercise, because I certainly would have a different lifestyle on this island (my favorite people aren’t the ones I work with). Most people seem to first cut back on their clothes, but I actually really care about my clothes, as ridiculous as it sounds. I love feeling the quality of some fabrics and appreciating some of the details that went into the construction. However, I have very few “evening” clothes, because I rarely have time to change before going to dinner, etc. I’ve also figured out how to make my work wardrobe overlap with my weekend one to save money. I wonder how those priorities would change if I didn’t go to the office…

    As a New Yorker, thinking about the house is much easier. People rarely come over to my tiny apartment, so there’s nobody opinion to care about. We have a television that most people think is tiny (at 28 inches), because that’s what fits, and we don’t have any audio equipment beyond some computer speakers that we plug into an iPod.

    I heartily support the idea of not caring what other people think — in a variety of other areas too — but my takeaway today has been to spend only for the life you have instead of the life you think you should have.

  11. This is a wonderful post that really puts everything into perspective. I think this especially applies to my age group – 20 somethings who have just recently graduated and started their careers, while trying to impress friends and coworkers with new purchases. The island metaphor is such a great one, and I will share it with my friends and family as much as I can. I think I might even write about this post on my blog. Thanks Trent!

  12. Covarr says:

    I’ve been known to buy expensive electronic gadgets, but not to impress other people. My expensive TV was so that I could have a nice TV with a gorgeous picture, because I can tell the difference, not so that other people could be jealous. I can’t imagine I would have bought one just to show off when there are so many things I’d rather do with my money that I can actually ENJOY using instead of just bragging about.

    Expensive clothing never ceases to baffle me; as long as it’s not cheaply made or absolutely hideous, and suits the occasion, it seems stupid to spend any more than is necessary.

    Anybody who measures themselves by their possessions, or worries that others will, is a fool.

  13. Benjamin says:

    “The difference between the items you’d have on the island and the things you actually have now is the stuff you’re buying solely to impress other people.”

    I disagree…

    Most people stuck on this desert island would likely have bigger homes, with more amenities than they have now if given the option.

    After all, being deserted the island would have no libraries, movies theaters, gyms, etc. and many may opt to have the features incorportate in their homes.

    Especially if “you can have whatever house you want and the items you want to have”.

    However, I do get you point that we sometimes waste a great deal of time and resources trying to impress other people.

    I think its Dave Ramsey that says “we buy things we can’t afford to impress people that we don’t like”.

  14. Interesting post. Of course if you’re living on an island with your closest family and friends you wouldn’t care much because you’re comfortable with them. They already know you for who you really are.

    Unfortunately, you can’t spend the rest of your life living on an island with your closest friends and family, well maybe… if you bought your own private island

    Anyways, my point is people that don’t know you will judge you based on what you look like. It’s sad, but true.

    For me, buying nice things allows me to set a goal and I have something to work towards. When I finally reach that goal and get that thing I wanted to buy, it confirms that I am moving in the right direction. Having nice things just reminds me to keep working hard and continue working towards the next goal.

    So when I buy something I think about how it will affect my life and how it will make me feel, not what other people will think of me.

    Cheers from http://www.InstaMotivation.com

  15. Beth says:

    Trent – Thanks again for another great post. I’ve been very much influenced by your last week’s posts especially.

    The best part of this mental exercise is that it forces you to create, in your mind, the sort of life you’d actually live without social pressures. Some people may really adore their enormous house, high-quality or expensive clothing, etc. But it helps to find out if you are spending money and resources on those things for your own enrichment, or simply as a way to impress others. This way, you can focus your resources on the things you truly DO love.

  16. This is a good thing to think about…the living to impress others thing can really sneak up on me! And really, it’s just pride at the root(at least for me).

  17. KC says:

    If I had no one to impress I’d be fat and out of shape. So maybe impressing other isn’t all bad. But as someone else said I like the feel and look of quality clothing. I am by no means a clothes horse, but I will spend money on clothing that fits me well and looks good (it usually lasts longer too). I like the way I look and more importantly I like the way I feel even if it is because I think others view me as more successful. I think part of being human is pandering to what other people see in us. It isn’t all bad.

  18. moneyclip says:

    I came to this realization about 5 years ago. I patch my own clothes, drive a 13 year old car, live in a tiny apartment with my wife, eat at home 95% of the time, and pair buying something with actual need rather than solely based on empty desires.

    I’ve also dumped a lot of friendships that I found were based on the superficiality described in this article.

    @jreed, I have and use a clothes line and actually look down on people who don’t have one. Those that limit themselves from making intelligently frugal choices like a clothes line are worse than the empty, shallow people they are trying to impress.

    Having fear to make economically necessary and needed changes in your life due to the perceived influence others have over you makes you a sad, limited human. Free your mind from the slavery of peer pressure; this is not junior high school, it’s your financial life and future.

  19. Trent says:

    If I lived on a desert island, a clothesline would be one of the first things I put up. One of my biggest regrets about the place I live now is that there’s really no good place to put a clothesline – there is no breeze near the house and putting one on the edge of the yard would place it smack in the middle of a large shared lawn shared by several homes where a bunch of kids converge almost every day to play (my kids among them) – and I don’t have the heart to do it to them.

  20. Louise says:

    8 years ago I moved from a federation inner city house in Australia’s largest city to a small beach house in a coastal town 100 km’s away from Australia’ second largest city. Some of my friends were supportive of this move but many weren’t. Their attitude was why move from a prestigous area with all amenities to a regional area with less to offer. Even those who were supportive of the actual move were mildly horrified when I bought a small, basic holiday house when I could have afforded a much bigger, flashier house. But why would I want that. I had moved in order to give myself financial freedom, and all the money freed up by moving from a capital city to a regional town was spent on investments instead of a flash house, new furniture or a new car. Their attitude was because I was still young enough to build up assets, that I should spend the money on a flash house and furniture and worry about investments later, my attitude was who cares about flash furniture, that wasn’t the reason I moved.

    Moving immediately culled the superficial friends, and even some of the friends I thought were more genuine. However I achieved my goals and am very happy with my decision.

    Work out your goals and spend money on things that help you move towards them, not on things that are based on other peoples beliefs of what your life should look like.

  21. gpglinka says:

    When I watch my big screen TV I am on my own island.

  22. Oh yes… I have been guilty of this. At the time of a major purchase (laptop, flat screen etc) ..I would and still can rationalize it as a need instead of a want.
    Putting things in perspective is not all that easy for me when it comes to making a simple purchase. I start talking to myself and usually I will talk myself right into the purchase.

  23. Patrick S. says:

    Good post but I have to disagree about the car part. I currently drive a 2002 Jeep but if I had the money, I would love to own a Corvette. Not because I want people to think I am rich or cool but rather because I love those cars! Otherwise, I’m pretty basic: 19″ color TV that’s 20 years old, no cell phone, buying my clothes at thrift stores, etc. I’m sure this impresses no one but us frugal folk.

  24. jcworth says:

    Happily, I couldnt think of a single thing I own to impress anyone else. That certainly wouldnt have been true when I was younger, one of the benefits of getting old I guess. On the other hand, maybe thats why I have no friends! I dont even impress myself…

  25. almost there says:

    Louise@, Good on ya. I have a friend that lives in Malabar in a council flat overlooking the Goal. She has the time of her life and does not let a modest income dictate the adventures she gets to try out, whether it be caravanning or saving for year to go on a holiday in the orient.

  26. ankita says:

    its actually true, and shocking at the same time..why do we spend a lot of money just to show off and that too to those people who are least important for us?And we think we are smart people…need to think over it once again..what say guys??

  27. Melinda says:

    I think you’re half right here, however it’s not always so cut and dried. I wear jeans and t-shirts around my nearest and dearest and I’d wear them 100% of the time if I could! However I also have a wardrobe of expensive nice clothes – because I need them for work. I am expected to dress to a certain level at work and jeans just don’t make the grade unfortunately!

    We also live in a wannabe McMansion in an upmarket suburb. Would we live here by choice – no. We live here in this big house because my husband is in the military and it’s a defence house. I tried to convince the housing area that we WANTED to live in a small house and they basically laughed. Mind you, our older and totally paid for cars do look a bit out of place in the middle of this suburb where the average car age is about two years. LOLOL!

    I’m just saying that I think the issue isn’t quite as black and white as you’ve posted it. Sometimes there are reasons that people have more than they appear to need and you can’t judge on looks alone.

  28. AD says:

    “If you have a closet full of expensive clothes, but would always wear jeans and a t-shirt around the people close to you, you’re spending money just to impress other people.”

    Or your office dress code specifically says no jeans! :) But yeah, I get the main point. It’s very true, and when you decide to just stop trying to impress, keep up, or portray an image, you can figure out what really makes you happy.

  29. WhirlMind says:

    Consider this possibility : Stretching the idea that “I don’t have to bother about someone” actually can make you eccentric. Eccentric again is a relative thing, but you shouldn’t realise that you have become eccentric one fine morning, if being labelled an eccentric actually makes you uncomfortable. Coming to “don’t bother”, just take wrist-watches, for example. What is it that separates a watch for men from a watch for women, except someone’s label ? The same thing is also true about color choices. You are FREE, of course, to make your choice, but you should also determine, whether you would be a comfortabe with the “eccentric” label, which others are free to make about you. Iwanda’s Comment #2 on the seminar-man’s jacket is an exampple. Also if “don’t bother” was okay, why would you provide a rider on “of course, it’s important to dress to culture”. How about dressing functionaly as you see it and accept the consequences ? Of course, you won’t have these problems on that island. If you make a list of the “flip sides” of taking a purely functional approach to everything and ignore other’s impressions, those are the ones, the reasons why people make choices the way they make them. A lot of people won’t be comfortable to be labelled eccentric. If it comes to functional merits like “green” choices that’s a different matter. I think, the island is a poor hypothecative example to handle this.

  30. AD says:

    Also, I just opted out of keeping up with the Joneses one day when I saw that driving fancy new cars and having a big house was going to prevent me from doing other things I love–like traveling. One trip to Europe completely changed my mindset. I’d rather drive old cars and live in a small house so I can sock away money every month for real, memorable experiences.

  31. M E @ says:

    I am especially stricken by the comment with regard to babies and/or toddlers and their clothing.

    My youngest nephew, who will be 5 in about a month, his mother (my brother and she are not married, never were, etc.) spends, IMO and my brother’s, obscene amounts of money on buying designer duds for him.

    We buy him nice clothes for his birthday and Christmas, yet she seems to turn her nose up at them and tells my brother to keep them at his house for my nephew to wear. @@

  32. jreed says:

    Your reasons for not putting up a clothesline have changed from your original blog. Truth teaches us much more than truthiness. Your own hearfelt struggles with these issues will yield many more responses than the condescending tone of “you should feel this” and “you shouldn’t think that”.
    I love my Honda Fit, my clothes from box stores and my service trade job but….sometimes getting cut off by a BMW driven by an expensively dressed, coifed and manicured professional does give me a twinge of inadequacy. Then I drive in my payment free car to my mortgage free home and look at my bank accounts. Not keeping up with the Joneses gives me a sense of freedom….
    Is there a breeze in the spare room where you currently dry your clothes?

  33. I agree with Patrick. A lot of the time, the reasons we buy things we don’t need but want isn’t to impress, it’s just because that’s one our things we’re really into. Like I would love an iPhone or TMobile’s G1 phone—not because they are the “it” thing to have—but because I love technology and gadgets.

  34. clashboard says:

    Hi everyone. This is my first post. I discovered this great site a few days ago, and I’ve been really engaged in all of Trent’s entries and reader comments that I’ve read so far!

    I definitely agree with Writer’s Coin. I’m really into cars and would love to buy a 2008 VW R32 ($27K), but I’m torn… should I take on a 5-year car loan that I can afford or should I be practical? I’ve made huge progress paying off my credit cards, mainly using Dave Ramsey’s techniques and I’m $6K away from becoming debt free.

    I’m still driving my ’97 Toyota RAV4 that I bought 11 years ago. It’s been trouble free, but man, I want that new car BADLY!

  35. Yolanda says:

    I agree 100%. We should not store up treasures here on earth, or live outside of our means. My husband and I have 5 children. We shopped around for a 5 bedroom two bathroom home and paid just $65,000 for it! It has a 15 x 20 eat in kitchen that is just beautiful and a huge fenced in back yard. It is perfect for our family and a perfect price! I cannot fathom why someone would want to pay $450,000+ for a huge home with no yard and the neighbors too close.
    We would love to have a big screen tv, but since it is not affordable to us, we settle for our 20″ regular t.v. We don’t need a big screen and we don’t care what our visitors think of us because we don’t have one. :)

  36. Battra92 says:

    I don’t know how much we buy to impress other people or how much we buy to keep up with the Joneses but at times I do wonder about how some things we buy just to enjoy them. For instance, if I had the room I’d own a full home theater. I wouldn’t want to impress anyone, I just love films and would love to be able to see certain classics in my own private theater.

    I have a 1 year old car. I keep it clean enough and an old man commented the other day at the grocery store that he liked my “new” car. Now I liked that he liked it, but frankly most people think my Elantra is kind of blah looking and boring to drive, which is just fine as I needed reliable and gas saving transportation to get to work. I’ll keep it at least 9 more years and then move on.

    Skimp on the non-durable goods and splurge on the durables, I say. That’s not impressing, that’s just being smart.

  37. Sally says:

    I think some keeping up is good. If it’s everything – then your life is out of balance. Let’s admit that it is fun to have some luxury – whatever that luxury may be to you. Maybe someone would have a smaller house – but a really expensive high count thread sheet set. Or – a really huge house with modest furnishings. A hut for a house (not much cleaning) with a hummer parked next to it – lots of fun driving around the island!

  38. plonkee says:

    I’m a very private person, and no one comes round to my house. If I lived on an island in the circumstances that you describe, I’d be forced to tidy up a lot more often. And eat better food. Even the people I don’t need to impress, I want to impress.

  39. diya says:

    gr8 article n true that we shud live for our comfort and not bother abt wat others think but this is again true that all people dont lead their life comparing n competing with others. we might go for luxurious items to make our loved ones happy for they r the ones who care abt us n the same care we show back to them by providing them with luxury n comfort that make them happy n also makes us feel good that we could do something for our loved ones..!

  40. Michael says:

    Were I on an island like that of the Swiss Family Robinson with my dear family, I would have a better house, better clothes, better everything. They might or might not be bigger, but they’d be better. Also, we would build a cathedral and memorize the Dream of the Rood. But I won’t do any of that here, so when I keep up my expensive health insurance I wish I had the guts to drop, am I trying to impress someone?

  41. Marcia says:

    I guess it totally depends on if I have a job on the island. I would be living in shorts and flip flops, with some exercise gear if I weren’t employed. But I am employed, and I have to wear long pants and close-toed shoes for safety. I would be happy to never wear a dress again, however.

    My house would be the same size, but with a bigger kitchen (I love to cook).

    I use a clothesline now and I still would. I would probably still like my electronics for entertainment (computer, Ipod) and organization (Palm).

    I totally get you on the baby clothes though. I have some friends who shop at fairly high-end stoers (maybe they are middle-end, but they seem high end to me – Gymboree?) My best friend shops there because she doesn’t have access to many hand-me-downs (though she does look at used stores) and she likes the quality.

    My neighbor shops there, and I just shudder at the cost. I am lucky that my best friend passes down all her son’s clothing to us, so we’ve maybe spent $300 in 2.5 years on clothing for him.

    I wonder if for some, it’s less “they need to look good” and more “it’s convenient”. We use hand-me-downs because they are incredibly convenient and available. If I had to spend time scouring yard sales and used clothing stores, I might feel differently. In fact, when I have “needed” something for my son that he didn’t already have, I generally just go to Kmart, rather than search the used market.

  42. What a great post!

    A few years ago I was a director of a non-profit geared towards teens. I purchased quite an expensive projector and surround system.

    Since the non-profit disbanded I kept the projector and even selected my apartment because of the large wall to watch movies.

    After reading this post when it was published I got to thinking. Do I really need that projector? I hardly ever even watch it anymore. The only reason I keep it around is for that reaction when people come over to watch movies. So I was inspired. I put it on ebay where I can expect to bring in upwards of $1000. That $1000 will go straight towards paying off the credit card debt with which I bought the projector!

    Thanks again for this post!

  43. Matt says:

    This article is the TRUTH! I think we are dealing with a self esteem issue. If a person doesn’t love themselves, they will buy things so that others will say, “Wow, look at what you have!” instead of “Wow, look at who you are!”

    The article clearly states that when you are about to buy something ask yourself, “WHO ARE YOU BUYING THIS FOR?” So therefore, most of the refuting of this article is off base.

    If it’s for you, then this article doesn’t apply. But the content here is truth.

  44. Rachel says:

    Hi Trent, You’ve inspired me to write about this as well, I hope you don’t mind terribly but I have quoted this article in my post. Keep up the awesome work, you have quite the fan base!

  45. Richard says:

    For me, For more years than I can recall, I could give a big whoop, about what anyone thinks of me, or the way I look. As there are 2 of us in this house, there are 2 cars. One 1991, one 1988. They get us to where we need to go. WE have a roof over our head, clothes to wear, food for our bellies, and that is enough. Two computers, One work, one personal. If there is anyone, in the world who wishes to judge me because of the way I look, it’s not my problem. If they are that shallow, They don’t need to be in my life, and that includes some of my relatives. It’s their problem, not mine. I only have 2 pair of jeans, without holes in them. Most of the collars on my shirts are worn out, but they still cover me and keep me warm, when needed. I have 1 pair of shoes, that are now 6 yrs old, and still are in good shape, no holes or worn out soles. All my bills are paid by the 7th of each month, and whats left supports us. Gas & such.
    The only person anyone needs to please is themself. Trying to live your life to please other people, means you are never going to be happy or satisfied. Make yourself Happy, and anybody else will be able to see that, and your life will be much better.

  46. luxurylover says:

    I don’t care about impressing other people, but I like the finer things in life. I think designer clothing looks better, I love the look of luxury cars, i want to travel in style to exotic places, and own a modest sized home in a decent neighborhood that is decorated with fine art pieces.

    What’s the matter with that? If I can have all that on the cheap and build wealth too why shouldn’t I?

  47. Mark says:

    @ Derek: Meanwhile, Warren Buffet has billions of dollars. If he says that we shouldn’t care about money then he is humble. If someone with a low income says the same thing then they are jealous because they could never afford it in the first place.

    Human nature 101.

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